Things you get no choice about

Jose:  I don’t want to be your friend anymore!

Henry:  (gets upset, then thinks for a moment)  You’re my cousin!

Mommy’s little Oedipus shifts loyalties

Henry’s been going through the Oedipal phase for at least a year now–as in walking into our bedroom, climbing into bed with us, and announcing, “Go away, Daddy!”  But the times they are a-changing.

Henry:  What’s that on your hand?

Mommy:  That’s my wedding ring.  Daddy has one, too.  We got them when we got married.

H:  I want one like that.

M:  Well, when you grow up, if you want to get married, you can get a ring like that.

H:  Can I marry you when I grow up?

M:  No, you can only be married to one person.  I’m already married to Daddy. 

H:  Who will I be married to?

M:  I don’t know yet.  When you grow up, you can decide who you want to marry.

H:  Okay, I’ll marry Daddy!

M:  But Daddy is already married to me.  You should marry someone your own age.  But when you’re grown up.

H:  Okay, when I grow up I will marry Daddy and get a ring like that.

M: [gives up]

Back to blogging

I’m baaaaack!  I don’t have much time for blogging these days, but Henry is such a person these days and I’m trying to hold on to the memories.  So I’ll try to start keeping up again.

So that’s what that is….

Latest in Henry’s discovery of the human body: “I have a tail!” 
Me: Really?
Henry: [points at penis]
Me: Actually, that’s your penis.  It’s where your peepee comes out of.
Henry: [preening in front of mirror] I have a tail!  Like a turtle!

Identity issues

Henry is always being something–usually some kind of animal.  Crawling, running, growling, roaring, quacking, barking, breathing fire.  Now that we seem to have gotten past the multi-month dinosaur phase–”I’m a stri-tera-ops!  I’m a T-rex!  I’m a stegosaurus!”–recent favorites include lobster, panda, ANIMAL tiger (as distinguished from Kung Fu Master Tigress), and the entire caterpillar-pupa-butterfly routine. 

Under the influence of his superhero-obsessed cousin, he recently announced, “I’m a dog.  I’m a SUPER dog.”  And yesterday he declared, “I’m a superhero DANCING!” and proceeded to do a very impressive little jig.

Lately he seems to be groping more toward concepts of gender–he will periodically announce, “I’m a GIRL panda” or something like that.  Interestingly, he never bothers to note that he is a BOY whatever–masculinity apparently still being the unstated norm in Henry’s world despite the efforts of mommy and her legions of feminist comrades.  He will, however, note specifically if he is being “a mommy lion,” or “a daddy elephant,” or “a baby bear cub.”  And occasionally he will respond to a question about “What are you now?” with “I’m just a boy.”  (Sometimes, “I’m just a kid.”)

The other day in the car he asked me if I was a girl.  I explained that I was a woman, which is what girls become when they grow up, just like boys grow into men.  (Apologies to the transgender activists and Judith Butlerites out there–I suppose I haven’t myself entirely accepted that we can–or at any rate, not easily) grow up into whatever gender we want, at least at the knee-jerk level of trying to explain things to a three-year-old while driving.)  Anyway, Henry responded blankly to this and demanded to know, “But mommy, are you a GIRL?”  Until I finally said, “Yes, I’m a girl.  A grown-up girl,” I added for good measure.  He was silent for a moment and then announced, “You’re MY girl.”  Melt.

After the usual rapid cycling this morning between lion, tiger, and anything else that could run around roaring, Henry announced at breakfast, “I’m a GIRL.  I’m a girl growing up.  I grow up to be…to be…to be…”  Mommy: “What, sweetie?”  Henry: “I grow up to be a TURTLE!”

Here he is as a caterpillar:

Birthday boy!

Henry is 3 today, and for the past week has been announcing that fact to anyone who will listen.  His preschool is having summer break this week, so he had his school party last Friday: a parade in his honor, followed by strawberry shortcake and dancing. 

Tonight: celebration with Mommy and Daddy.  This weekend: celebration with Grandma, aunt, uncle, and cousins!  More photos soon.

Cousins!

One of the most exciting events lately (aside from Aunt J’s wedding, about which more later) was visits from all of Henry’s cousins on both sides in April.  Even more exciting is the fact that cousins Jose and Nicolas will be moving here later this summer.  It’s certainly fun to see Henry and Jose (9 months apart) playing together.  Of course, it is not always blissful, and their fighting styles (here: over who gets to hide for “Hide and Seek” prove that they are both the spitting image of their mamas–notice who digs in his heels and refuses to give in, and who runs crying for mommy…

But the sweet moments outweigh those by a mile…

 

 

Back to the blogosphere…

Yeah, it’s hard to keep up with posting about the little dude while actually raising him, but this summer I’m going to try to catch up again.

What do turtles really want?

I know this question has been plaguing you all.  Here’s Henry’s take, as explained to me in the car yesterday.

Henry:  I see turtles at the zoo!

Mommy:  Yes, we did see turtles at the zoo, didn’t we?

H:  Turtles in the water!

M:  Yes, the turtles were swimming in the lake.

H:  Turtles all wet.

M:  Yes, sweetie, the turtles got all wet.

H: [long pause, very solemn]  Turtles want a towel.

Secrets of the Sea

You learn something new every day. Although I am the sort of person who wonders about all kinds of completely random things, it had never occurred to me to wonder about how marine mammals sleep. And then my husband brought home this book for our son. It’s a beautiful look at all the different ways the animals manage to sleep in the ocean, with a little child dreaming of sleeping alongside them.

Dolphins sleep with one eye open for protection, and take turns having awake dolphins swim in circles around the rest. Whale babies sleep in the wake of the mother’s flipper and are carried along in the current. Sea otters wrap themselves in kelp to keep themselves from drifting away in the water, and put their paws on their faces to keep them warm. And the little child sleeps beside them in his kelpy blanket.

What does my baby dream, after reading this book before bed, carefully covered with a blue flannel blanket to keep him from drifting too far away from us?